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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Alignment Quotes
Funny Quotes about Alignment

Let these funny Alignment Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Great relationships begin with two people who are each
self confident and who come to each other with the openness
to see and accept the other as a unique and wonderful person.
If there is true love and an alignment of fundamental values,
choose to join your life with your new partner
and vow never to criticize their nature -
the essence that makes them uniquely themselves.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous


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The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II

We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

Hey, Marge. Isn't it great being married
to someone who's recklessly impulsive?
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)


 

I am prepared to meet my Maker.
Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal
of meeting me is another matter.
- Winston Churchill

You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein

Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard

To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle.
- Lewis Carroll

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.
- John Lennon

I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality
by contact with this great novel land of yours
which sticks up out of the Atlantic.
- Winston Churchill

New York City is a great monument
to the power of money and greed...
a race for rent.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron

People who think they know everything
are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
- Isaac Asimov

No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective

The magic words for a great relationship are,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The essence of life is not in
the great victories and grand failures,
but in the simple joys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Silence is a source of great strength.
- Lao Tzu

Where there is great love,
there are always miracles.
- Willa Cather

If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To be one, to be united is a great thing.
But to respect the right to be different is maybe even greater.
- Bono

Regrets and resentments cause great suffering but fix nothing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I long to accomplish a great and noble task,
but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks
as if they were great and noble.
- Helen Keller

Dare to dream of your great success.
Become intimate with those things
which deeply motivate you
and regularly work toward
the realization of that mission.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

I have a great deal of company in the house,
especially in the morning when nobody calls.
- Henry David Thoreau

You're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So... get on your way!
- Dr. Seuss

Life in abundance comes only through great love.
- Elbert Hubbard

Life is a great big canvas,
and you should throw all the paint you can on it.
- Danny Kaye

Great minds discuss ideas;
average minds discuss events;
small minds discuss people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Dare to dream of your great success.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In great contests, each party claims to act
in accordance with the will of God.
Both may be, and one must be wrong.
- Abraham Lincoln

Neither a man nor a crowd nor a nation
can be trusted to act humanely
or to think sanely under the influence of a great fear.
- Bertrand Russell

No crime is so great as daring to excel.
- Winston Churchill

The great end of life is not knowledge but action.
- Thomas Henry Huxley

If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

It gives me great pleasure indeed to see the stubbornness
of an incorrigible nonconformist warmly acclaimed.
- Albert Einstein

Don't be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.
- John D. Rockefeller

One of the surest ways to cause
yourself great suffering
is to insist upon being right -
to demand that all others view life
exactly as you view it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Confidence is the most important single factor in this game,
and no matter how great your natural talent,
there is only one way to obtain and sustain it: work.
- Jack Nicklaus

Unconditional war can no longer lead to unconditional victory.
It can no longer serve to settle disputes...
can no longer be of concern to great powers alone.
- John F. Kennedy

Being is the great explainer.
- Henry David Thoreau

Before we acquire great power
we must acquire wisdom to use it well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Great spirits have always encountered
violent opposition from mediocre minds.
- Albert Einstein

The Two Great Lessons of Life: Choose Love & Trust God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Living in fear of anything is a terrible waste
of what could be a great life.
If you live in fear of losing your job,
either you fear the embarrassment of being jobless,
or you fear the loss of material goods -
house, car, and such.
If you live in fear of losing your stuff and money,
it is clear that they own you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Know that the essence of life is not
in the great victories and grand failures,
but in the simple joys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The mediocre teacher tells.
The good teacher explains.
The superior teacher demonstrates.
The great teacher inspires.
- William Arthur Ward

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish.
Do not overdo it.
- Lao Tzu

You will become as small as your controlling desire;
as great as your dominant aspiration.
- James Allen

Until you'll willing to look foolish,
you'll never have the possibility of being great.
- Cher

The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore

The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie,
deliberate, contrived and dishonest,
but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic.
- John F. Kennedy

Trust men and they will be true to you;
treat them greatly and they will show themselves great.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Love is the great miracle cure.
Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.
- Louise L. Hay

To accomplish great things,
we must not only act, but also dream;
not only plan, but also believe.
- Anatole France

Small opportunities are often
the beginning of great enterprises.
- Demosthenes

That some achieve great success,
is proof to all that others can achieve it as well.
- Abraham Lincoln

I welcome change as a great adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A little neglect may breed great mischief.
- Benjamin Franklin

Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers,
who can cut through argument, debate, and doubt
to offer a solution everybody can understand.
- Colin Powell

Everything that is really great and inspiring
is created by the individual who can labor in freedom.
- Albert Einstein

Great talents are the most lovely
and often the most dangerous
fruits on the tree of humanity.
They hang upon the most slender twigs
that are easily snapped off.
- Carl Jung

Life is about more than today, and more than yourself.
What will your legacy be?
What will your great-grandchildren be told about you?
Creating a legacy does not have to be a burden,
it can be your joy and can create
your satisfaction with living each day.
What kind of world do you want to leave your great-grandchildren?
What can you do today to help create that world?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Character is higher than intellect.
A great soul will be strong to live as well as think.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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