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There are two kinds of failures:
by Laurence J. Peter

There are two kinds of failures:
those who thought and never did,
and those who did and never thought.
- Laurence J. Peter

Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter PHOTO

Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

Facts are stubborn things,
but statistics are more pliable.
- Laurence J. Peter


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Education is a method whereby
one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
- Laurence J. Peter

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter

Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
- Laurence J. Peter


 

Oh, if only God would give me some sign.
If He would just speak to me once. Anything.
One sentence. Two words. If He would just cough.
- the movie Love and Death

There are two things that are more difficult
than making an after-dinner speech:
climbing a wall which is leaning toward you
and kissing a girl who is leaning away from you.
- Winston Churchill

One good Husband is worth two good Wives;
for the scarcer things are, the more they're valued.
- Benjamin Franklin

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous

Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
- Art Buchwald

Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous

Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous

When two people decide to get a divorce,
it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another,
but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.
- Helen Rowland

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

You know, it takes two to get one in trouble.
- the movie She Done Him Wrong (1933)

I truly believe that happiness is possible...
even when you're thirty-three
and have a bottom the size of two bowling balls.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason

Give the right man two fishes and some bread,
and he will feed the world;
give the wrong man two fishes and some bread
and he will invent the fast-food fish sandwich.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

My wife and I tried two or three times in the last 40 years
to have breakfast together,
but it was so disagreeable we had to stop.
- Winston Churchill

Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

The rite of the rings appeals yet appalls:
a cutting, a joining, a losing, a gaining.
One becomes half, as two become one.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin

Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous

The will to believe chases out the rational mind,
whenever and wherever the two come into conflict.
- Philip K. Dick

There are two kinds of people,
those who do the work,
and those who take the credit.
Try to be in the first group;
there is less competition there.
- Indira Gandhi

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis"
is composed of two characters.
One represents danger and the other represents opportunity.
- John F. Kennedy

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

Having two bathrooms ruined the capacity to co-operate.
- Margaret Mead

I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein

In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns

Praying is important when you wake up
at two o'clock in the morning
feeling sick from eating something dumb the day before.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
- Abraham Lincoln

Every tomorrow has two handles.
We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety
or the handle of faith.
- Henry Ward Beecher

There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather

There are only two ways to live your life.
One is as though nothing is a miracle.
The other is as though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein

Understanding is a two-way street.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated;
you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
- David Lloyd George

Prejudice is a two-edged sword.
Like the steel sort of sword, it's very sharp, very useful,
and very dangerous if not properly mastered.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Sadness is but a wall between two gardens.
- Khalil Gibran

Friendship is one mind in two bodies.
- Mencius

Music fills the infinite between two souls.
- Rabindranath Tagore

There are two things to aim at in life:
first, to get what you want,
and after that to to enjoy it.
- Logan Pearsall Smith

When I am getting ready to reason with a man,
I spend one-third of my time thinking about myself
and what I am going to say
and two-thirds about him and what he is going to say.
- Abraham Lincoln

Unity can only be manifested by the Binary.
Unity itself and the idea of Unity are already two.
- The Buddha

The two powers which in my opinion constitute a wise man
are those of bearing and forbearing.
- Epictetus

People sort themselves into groups
of happy people and unhappy people
through two different, but complementary mechanisms,
influence and affinity.
I influence those around me
with my emotional state, either happy or unhappy.
At the same time, I feel an affinity
for others who are like me in some way -
in this case by sharing my emotional outlook on life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

At the beginning and at the end of love,
the two lovers are embarrassed to find themselves alone.
- Jean de la Bruyere

It takes two to speak the truth:
one to speak, and another to hear.
- Henry David Thoreau

Two little words that can make the difference: START NOW.
- Mary C. Crowley

We were given:
Two hands to hold.
Two legs to walk.
Two eyes to see.
Two ears to listen.
But why only one heart?
Because the other was given to someone else.
For us to find.
- Anonymous

Friendship is not possible between two women
one of whom is very well dressed.
- Laurie Colwin

There are always two forces warring against each other within us.
- Paramahansa Yogananda

To live a satisfying life requires two steps...
1. Plan your life goals.
2. Act on your plan - every day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

As you grow older you will discover that you have two hands.
One for helping yourself, the other for helping others.
- Audrey Hepburn

Falling in love and having a relationship
are two different things.
- Keanu Reeves

Pride comes in two flavors -
choose honor, not ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We have two ears and one mouth so that
we can listen twice as much as we speak.
- Epictetus

Cause and effect are two sides of one fact.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The career of a sage is of two kinds:
He is either honored by all in the world,
Like a flower waving its head,
Or else he disappears into the silent forest.
- Lao Tzu

As a rock star, I have two instincts,
I want to have fun, and I want to change the world.
I have a chance to do both.
- Bono

All philosophy lies in two words,
sustain and abstain.
- Epictetus

The Two Great Lessons of Life: Choose Love & Trust God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Love is a game that two can play and both win.
- Eva Gabor

There are two lasting bequests we can give our children
One is roots, the other is wings.
- Hodding Carter

Friendship is a strong and habitual inclination in two persons
to promote the good and happiness of one another.
- Eustace Budgell

You can close more business in two months
by becoming interested in other people
than you can in two years by trying
to get people interested in you.
- Dale Carnegie

The meeting of two personalities is
like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
- Carl Jung

Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.
- Aristotle

People generally complain about only two things:
when they have less than yesterday,
and when they have less than their neighbor.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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