Enter one or two keywords to search these Funny Quotes.

Hint: keep it simple, like life twain



Facebook share   Tweet This   Email this

Funny Quotes about Life
Funny Quotes about Life | Funny Love Quotes | Links | About
Search:   A-   B-   Ca-   Co-   D-   E-   F-   G-   H-    I-    J-K-L   M-   N-O   Pa-   Pr-   Q-R   Sa-   Sk-   T-   U-V-W-X-Y-Z


Get a Humorous, Yet Insightful, Quote of the Day each day by email.
Follow funny-quotes-life.com by Email:


No one can make you jealous, angry, vengeful, or greedy -
by Napoleon Hill

No one can make you jealous, angry, vengeful, or greedy -
unless you let him.
- Napoleon Hill

Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off
until the day after tomorrow what should
have been done the day before yesterday.
- Napoleon Hill

Do it Now!
- Napoleon Hill

Patience, persistence and perspiration
make an unbeatable combination for success.
- Napoleon Hill


Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.

 Subscribe in a reader -- or
Enter your email address:




Delivered by FeedBurner


Cherish your visions and your dreams as they are the children
of the blueprints of your ultimate achievements.
- Napoleon Hill

Whatever the mind can conceive and believe,
it can achieve.
- Napoleon Hill

The majority of men meet with failure
because of their lack of persistence
in creating new plans to take
the place of those which fail.
- Napoleon Hill


 

Everyone enjoys doing the kind of work
for which he is best suited.
- Napoleon Hill

The starting point of all achievement is desire.
- Napoleon Hill

Great achievement is usually born of great sacrifice,
and is never the result of selfishness.
- Napoleon Hill

Your big opportunity may be right where you are now.
- Napoleon Hill

Success... A goal is a dream with a deadline.
- Napoleon Hill

Action is the real measure of intelligence.
- Napoleon Hill (author of the classic Think and Grow Rich)

A goal is a dream with a deadline.
- Napoleon Hill

Self-disciplined begins with the mastery of your thoughts.
If you don't control what you think,
you can't control what you do.
Simply, self-discipline enables you
to think first and act afterward.
- Napoleon Hill

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!

And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)

I have no fear of the gallows ... They're going to shoot me.
- the movie Love and Death

When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner

No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin

Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death

No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous

Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
- Art Buchwald

Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)

You have no values. With you its all nihilism,
cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears,
for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.
- Albert Einstein

I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard

There is no such thing as public opinion.
There is only published opinion.
- Winston Churchill

It is the things for which there is no evidence
that are believed with passion.
- Bertrand Russell

Experience keeps a dear school,
but fools will learn in no other.
- Benjamin Franklin

As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin

No one was ever named "Hero" for following the crowd.
Heroes set their own course.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

No problem is so formidable that
you can't walk away from it.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

In theory there is no difference between theory and practice.
In practice there is.
- Yogi Berra

Less is only more where more is no good.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
- Mark Twain

Computers are like Old Testament gods;
lots of rules and no mercy.
- Joseph Campbell

Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
- Laurence J. Peter

I find that principles have no real force
except when one is well fed.
- Mark Twain

The worst government is often the most moral.
One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane.
But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
- H. L. Mencken

When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann

Faced with the choice between changing one's mind
and proving that there is no need to do so,
almost everyone gets busy on the proof.
- John Kenneth Galbraith

Science may have found a cure for most evils;
but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller

Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain

He who loves 50 people has 50 woes;
he who loves no one has no woes.
- The Buddha

An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde

A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields

Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden

I am no longer young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde

He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde

Every one desires to live long,
but no one would be old.
- Abraham Lincoln

Some people are so heavenly minded
that they are no earthly good.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

It has been my experience that folks who
have no vices, have very few virtues.
- Abraham Lincoln

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

The universe we observe has precisely
the properties we should expect
if there is, at bottom, no design,
no purpose, no evil, no good,
nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.
- Charles Darwin

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

Early in life I had to choose between honest arrogance
and hypocritical humility.
I chose the former and have seen no reason to change.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

The way to silence religious disputes is to take no notice of them.
- Thomas Jefferson


Thank you for visiting: No one can make you jealous, angry, vengeful, or greedy - by Napoleon Hill.

Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.

You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.

May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


Funny Quotes

 


All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.