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Zen Koan Quotes
Funny Quotes by Zen Koan

Let these funny Zen Koan Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.

The True Path is the path on which
there is no coming and no going.
- Traditional Zen Koan

What is the Sound of One Hand Clapping?
- Traditional Zen Koan

Overflowing Cup of Tea:
The Zen Master poured his visitor's teacup full, and then kept pouring.
The visitor watched until he could no longer restrain himself.
"It is overfull. No more will go in!"
"Like this cup," the Zen Master said,
"you are full of your own opinions and assumptions.
How can you learn truth until you first empty your cup?"
- Traditional Zen Koan

The Moon Cannot Be Stolen:
A thief entered the little hut of a Zen Master,
but discovered there was nothing to steal.
The Zen Master discovered the thief.
"You have come a long way to visit me," he told the prowler,
"and you should not return empty-handed.
Please take my clothes as a gift."
The thief was bewildered,
but he took the clothes and slunk away.
The Zen Master sat naked, watching the moon.
"Poor fellow," he mused,
"I wish I could have given him this beautiful moon."
- Traditional Zen Koan


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Time to Die:
A Zen teacher had a rare and priceless teacup.
One day, his precocious student accidentally broke the cup.
Hearing the footsteps of his teacher,
the student held the pieces of the cup behind his back.
When the master appeared, he asked: "Why do people have to die?"
"This is natural," explained the teacher.
"Everything has to die and has just so long to live."
The student showed the shattered cup, saying,
"It was time for your cup to die."
- Traditional Zen Koan

The Sweetest Strawberry:
A man traveling across a field encountered a tiger.
He fled, the tiger after him.
Coming to a precipice,
he caught hold of the root of a wild vine
and swung himself over the edge.
The tiger sniffed at him from above.
Trembling, the man looked down to where,
far below, another tiger was waiting to eat him.
Only the vine sustained him.
Two mice, one white and one black,
little by little started to gnaw away the vine.
The man then saw a luscious strawberry near him.
Grasping the vine with one hand,
he plucked the strawberry with the other.
How sweet it tasted.
- Zen Koan

I don't care what anybody says about me
as long as it isn't true.
- Truman Capote


 

True believers just don't see things the way they are,
because if they did, they wouldn't be true believers anymore.
- Philip Caputo

True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal

True friendship's laws are by this rule express'd,
Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest.
- Alexander Pope

Children, cartoon animals, comedians,
and space aliens can get away with saying
what the rest of us are afraid is true,
but are embarrassed to talk about.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is sad but unfortunately true that
man learns nothing from history.
- Carl Jung

If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin

True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

This above all, to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare PHOTO

There are a terrible lot of lies going about the world,
and the worst of it is that half of them are true.
- Winston Churchill

A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson

A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde

The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill

All our dreams can come true,
if we have the courage to pursue them.
- Walt Disney PHOTO

Faith: not wanting to know what is true.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

Religion is regarded by the common people as true,
by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Where there is shouting, there is no true knowledge.
- Leonardo da Vinci PHOTO

People are stupid;
given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything.
Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie
because they want to believe it's true,
or because they are afraid it might be true.
- Terry Goodkind

Every religion is true one way or another.
It is true when understood metaphorically.
But when it gets stuck in its own metaphors,
interpreting them as facts, then you are in trouble.
- Joseph Campbell

The true meaning of life is to plant trees,
under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
- Nelson Henderson PHOTO

I do not need anyone's permission to be my true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie PHOTO

True love is a process of co-creation
in which neither feels ownership or superiority.
Jealousy is a highly destructive force
for love and relationships.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie PHOTO

The book of life is filled with incoherent riddles.
Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.
- Oscar Wilde

You do not need anyone's permission to be your true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If I try to be like him, who will be like me?
- Yiddish proverb

Man prefers to believe what he prefers to be true.
- Francis Bacon

The WORK
1.Is it true?
2.Can you absolutely know that it's true?
3.How do you react when you think that thought?
4.Who would you be without the thought?
- Byron Katie

True friendship is like sound health;
the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.
- Charles Caleb Colton

Your inner thoughts reveal your true nature.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I used to believe in forever, but forever's too good to be true.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

True friendship is never serene.
- Marquise de Sevigne

The course of true love never did run smooth.
- William Shakespeare

True Love burns the brightest,
But the brightest flames leave the deepest scars.
- Anonymous

For those of true faith, death is not a time to mourn,
but a time to celebrate returning to the Creator.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Those who realize their folly are not true fools.
- Zhuangzi

The secret of making dreams come true
can be summarized in four C's.
They are Curiosity, Confidence, Courage, and Constancy;
and the greatest of these is Confidence.
- Walt Disney

One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship
is to understand and to be understood.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
- William Shakespeare

A true friend is one who believes in you
when you have ceased to believe in yourself.
- Anonymous

Pity may represent little more
than the impersonal concern
which prompts the mailing of a check,
but true sympathy is the personal concern
which demands the giving of one's soul.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Only one who devotes himself to a cause
with his whole strength and soul
can be a true master.
For this reason mastery demands all of a person.
- Albert Einstein

Everything deep is also simple
and can be reproduced simply
as long as its reference
to the whole truth is maintained.
But what matters is not what is witty
but what is true.
- Albert Schweitzer

A true friend is the one who
walks in when others walk out.
- Walter Winchell

Every loving thought is true.
Everything else is an appeal for healing and help,
regardless of the form it takes.
- A Course In Miracles

The function of education is to teach one
to think intensively and to think critically.
Intelligence plus character - that is the goal of true education.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

True genius resides in the capacity for evaluation
of uncertain, hazardous, and conflicting information.
- Winston Churchill

True friends are appreciative and never demanding.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

True courage is not the brutal force of vulgar heroes,
but the firm resolve of virtue and reason.
- Alfred North Whitehead

In true friendship, one can express
anything and everything without feeling ashamed
or afraid of being rejected.
- Aparna Chatterjee

A true friendship always feels safe and comfortable.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When we find someone whose weirdness
is compatible with ours,
we join up with them and fall into
mutually satisfying weirdness -
and call it love - true love.
- Robert Fulghum.

Under a government which imprisons any unjustly,
the true place for a just man is also a prison.
- Henry David Thoreau

Intolerance is itself a form of violence
and an obstacle to the growth of a true democratic spirit.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

There are certain pursuits which,
if not wholly poetic and true,
do at least suggest a nobler and finer
relation to nature than we know.
The keeping of bees, for instance.
- Henry David Thoreau

Those of true faith don't require guaranteed security.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We censor our actions, but
our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It costs you nothing to make another happy -
and you gain your true self through the act of spreading joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

"To know" is to know that you know nothing.
That is the meaning of true knowledge.
- Confucius

The most telling act of true Faith
is celebrating the death of a loved one
with the certain knowledge that
they are now in a better place.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Far from idleness being the root of all evil,
it is rather the only true good.
- Soren Kierkegaard

If what Proust says is true,
that happiness is the absence of fever,
then I will never know happiness.
For I am possessed by a fever
for knowledge, experience, and creation.
- Anais Nin

Many persons have a wrong idea of
what constitutes true happiness.
It is not attained through self-gratification
but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
- Helen Keller


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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