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Gracie Allen Quotes
Funny Quotes by Gracie Allen

Let these funny Gracie Allen Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.

Smartness runs in my family.
When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was
in my class for five years.
- Gracie Allen

Brains, integrity, and force may be all very well,
but what you need today is Charm.
Go ahead and work on your economic programs if you want to,
I'll develop my radio personality.
- Gracie Allen

When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
- Gracie Allen

The President of today is just the postage stamp of tomorrow.
- Gracie Allen


 

When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she'd just make
enough for 16 and only serve half.
- Gracie Allen

This used to be a government of checks and balances.
Now it's all checks and no balances.
- Gracie Allen

A brain is a society of very small, simple modules
that cannot be said to be thinking,
that are not smart in themselves.
But when you have a network of them together,
out of that arises a kind of smartness.
- Kevin Kelly


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Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I

He who joyfully marches in rank and file
has already earned my contempt.
He has been given a large brain by mistake,
since for him the spinal cord would suffice.
- Albert Einstein

"Rabbit's clever," said Pooh thoughtfully.
"Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever."
"And he has Brain."
"Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit has Brain."
There was a long silence.
"I suppose," said Pooh, "that that's why he never understands anything."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Non-violence, which is the quality of the heart,
cannot come by an appeal to the brain.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

It's called a pen.
It's like a printer, hooked straight to my brain.
- Dale Dauten

Do not call for black power or green power.
Call for brain power.
- Barbara Jordan

An idea not coupled with action will never get any
bigger than the brain cell it occupied.
- Arnold H. Glasow

Toleration is the greatest gift of the mind;
it requires the same effort of the brain
that it takes to balance oneself on a bicycle.
- Helen Keller

Our brain is the factory of the emotions
- don Miguel Ruiz

Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.
- Edward de Bono

Reading, after a certain age,
diverts the mind too much from its creative pursuits.
Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little
falls into lazy habits of thinking.
- Albert Einstein

The human brain starts working the moment you are born
and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.
- George Jessel

Any man who reads too much
and uses his own brain too little
falls into lazy habits of thinking.
- Albert Einstein

I used to want to be a lawyer, but I didn't want to
have half my brain sucked out.
- Max Walker

Some guys say beauty is only skin deep.
But when you walk into a party, you don't see somebody's brain.
The initial contact has to be the sniffing.
- James Caan

Supercomputers will achieve one human brain capacity by 2010,
and personal computers will do so by about 2020.
- Ray Kurzweil

The basis of computer work is predicated on the idea
that only the brain makes decisions and only the index finger does the work.
- Brian Eno

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the
moment you get up in the morning and does not stop
until you get into the office.
- Robert Frost

There is no need for temples,
no need for complicated philosophies.
My brain and my heart are my temples;
my philosophy is kindness.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells.
Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living,
it's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope.
Which is what I do, and that enables you to laugh at life's realities.
- Dr. Seuss

This is my simple religion.
There is no need for temples;
no need for complicated philosophy.
Our own brain, our own heart is our temple;
the philosophy is kindness.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

There will one day spring from the brain of science
a machine or force so fearful in its potentialities,
so absolutely terrifying, that even man,
the fighter, who will dare torture and death in order
to inflict torture and death,
will be appalled, and so abandon war forever.
- Thomas A. Edison

Whenever the pressure of our complex city life thins
my blood and numbs my brain,
I seek relief in the trail; and when I hear the coyote
wailing to the yellow dawn,
my cares fall from me - I am happy.
- Hamlin Garland

We are dealing with the best-educated generation in history.
But they've got a brain dressed up with nowhere to go.
- Timothy Leary

It is good to rub and polish our brain against that of others.
- Michel de Montaigne

I think it's so important to keep learning and keep your brain active.
- Beverley Mitchell

Who should have spent their money on a brain implant?
- Anne Robinson

Art, to me, is the interpretation of the impression
which nature makes upon the eye and brain.
- Childe Hassam

All I know is that I operate by going out to each of
them and trying to learn the territory in which they operate.
My language to each of them has to suit their brain.
- Sam Mendes

We want Google to be the third half of your brain.
- Sergey Brin

Let schoolmasters puzzle their brain,
With grammar, and nonsense, and learning,
Good liquor, I stoutly maintain, Gives genius a better discerning.
- Oliver Goldsmith

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis,
and only enough blood to run one at a time.
- Robin Williams

Science Fiction will never run out of things to wonder
about until the human race ceases to use its brain.
- Julian May

In modelling, there is no point in trying to prove you have a brain,
so why even bother? I'd sooner save the energy for
something more meaningful.
- Helena Christensen

Mentoring is a brain to pick, an ear to listen,
and a push in the right direction.
- John C. Crosby

I actually feel that the different kinds of stories
come out of different parts of my brain.
- Elizabeth Moon

When I work I am pure as an angel tiger and clear is
my eye and hot my brain and silent all the whining
grunting piglets of the appetites.
- Marge Piercy

Ideas not coupled with action never become bigger than
the brain cells they occupied.
- Arnold H. Glasgow

I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people
would misspell my name and call me Brain.
That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it.
- Mitch Hedberg

If people would know how little brain is ruling the world,
they would die of fear.
- Ivo Andric

Let's not get too precious about it:
actors are not heart surgeons or brain surgeons.
We are just entertaining people.
- Malcolm McDowell

Good for you, you have a heart, you can be a liberal.
Now, couple your heart with your brain,
and you can be a conservative.
- Glenn Beck

My brain is open.
- Paul Erdos

There are two contrary impulses which govern this man's brain-the one sane,
and the other eccentric.
They alternate at regular intervals.
- Franz Schubert

Use your brain, not your endurance.
- Peter Thomson

When I draw something, the brain and the hands work together.
- Tadao Ando

I think it's so important to feed your brain you know.
Sometimes you've just got to read.
- Vanessa Brown

No man's brain is so dull, and no man's eye so blind,
that they cannot catch food for dreams.
- Donald G. Mitchell

My songs are a direct route into my brain and my heart.
- Vanessa Carlton

I'd love to go to art school.
I'd love to learn how to draw.
I'd love to be fluent in Spanish.
I'd like to be a brain surgeon.
- Billie Joe Armstrong

It's also a more personal medium.
It seems to go directly to one's brain.
There are no pictures to distract.
- Bob Edwards

For anyone with half a brain they can see that this
play is about the human condition.
- Estelle Parsons

Invention flags, his brain goes muddy,
and black despair succeeds brown study.
- William Congreve

The brain is wider than the sky.
- Emily Dickinson

This wretched brain gave way, and I became a wreck at random driven,
without one glimpse of reason or heaven.
- Thomas More

The individual, man as a man, man as a brain,
if you like, interests me more than what he makes,
because I've noticed that most artists only repeat themselves.
- Marcel Duchamp

I can't give you a brain, but I can give you a diploma.
- L. Frank Baum

The same parts of my brain get as excited as when I
study bio or read a novel and write a paper on it.
- Utada Hikaru

When I cook, my brain stops completely.
- Dino De Laurentiis

Golf is a search for perfection, for balance.
It's about meditation and concentration.
You have to use hand and brain.
- Celine Dion

Human beings have an inalienable right to invent themselves;
when that right is pre-empted it is called brain-washing.
- Germaine Greer

Dr. Einstein was not successful in school,
but he found something in the air from his own imagination and his own brain power,
and look what he did.
- Eartha Kitt


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